Ball Bag #2 – The Pelican Punting Mailbag

Another busy week here at Pelican Towers – this blog is certainly a time thief, and I have a heavy and swollen Ball Bag which requires immediate attention.  To the letters!

 Chris, formerly of Otago (but now leaching off the hospitality of the Australian people) writes

 “Has there ever been an episode of choking by an team in the NFL on the scale of Team NZ in this year’s America’s Cup?”

 Great question Chris.  There are a bunch of sites dedicated to NFL chokes, like this one, but the general consensus seems to be kicker Scott Norwood’s choke in Superbowl XXV, which gifted the game to the Buffalo Bills, is top of the list.  I suspect poor old Scott was probably the inspiration for Ray Finkle, the ill fated Miami Dolphins kicker from Ace Ventura – Pet Detective (“Laces Out!!”).  How does it rate compared to Team NZ – assuming they drop the last race and lose 9-8 (after leading 8-1 and being ahead in what should have been the clincher), Team NZ’s performance is worse.  Much worse.

 We’ve had quite a few letters, tweets and emails from Aussies who are having trouble embracing the NFL.  Jim from Lilyfield’s correspondence is typical

 “Why do you even like NFL. It’s so gay.  I don’t understand the rules and have never taken an interest in learning them.  I couldn’t even be bothered watching a game.  Plus people get paid too much.  And it goes for a long time. I don’t see why you would be interested in learning about new things and supporting something that we don’t even really play here.  Aussie Aussie Aussie!” 

 To Jim, and anyone who happens to empathise with him, we say “Bugger off”.  On the plus side, your negativity, judgements based on poor or no information, lack of interest in new experiences, and misplaced nationalism mean you have a promising career as a Liberal Party politician ahead of you.

 Our next letter comes to us all the way from the Orient.  Peter from Hong Kong writes

 “Hey fellas, really enjoying the blog and the insights.  I hate the NFL, and think it is a largely pointless sport with a limited fan base, but I am interested in your view after 3 weeks on the chances of the Seahawks to win the Superbowl – I know they are now second favourites at $5, but as we always say, you have to lose one to win one, and Seattle hasn’t lost one since 2006 (their only appearance), which is a while ago, so I think they need to lose one more recently to really get that winning feeling back.  I think next year is probably their year.  Of course, we also always say that the outsiders usually win the big events, and if you can find the winner you are going to get good value, so I will be looking at someone like the Chiefs or Cowboys ($21).  But neither of them have lost a big playoff game recently either.  Hmm.  The Ravens are $26, so they tick the outsiders box, plus they have the all important experience in the big games, which, as we always say, is very important – but then again, they won last year, and in this competition, which is generally so even, as we always say, it’s very difficult for one team to dominate multiple years. It’s a tough one, but in the interests of full disclosure, I have backed the Broncos to win @ $4.50.  Mainly because I like their uniforms. And I like the name Peyton.  Pey…ton.”

 Thanks Pete – I am sure that made sense to someone out there.  No doubt someone who is busy writing their memoirs on the wall of a mental asylum with their own faeces.

 And that’s the Ball Bag for this week!  Come back tomorrow for the weekly “What we learned” rap of Round 3, and of course my all important Thursday Night Fever later in the week.


By gargyandshirt Posted in NFL

2 comments on “Ball Bag #2 – The Pelican Punting Mailbag

  1. Regarding Jim’s sexual preference comment: is this because of the players coming out recently?

    Haiku: Big $$$
    NFL, paychecks
    capitalism coming
    to your country soon

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